Filed under: Daily Specials | Tags: bums, laundromat, life, men, observations, prostitution, random
Last night’s drink: Vampire Merlot
I’ve been aching to write about an experience I had at the laundromat last week.
At 7 p.m., it was already dark out, but the inside of the place was brighter than day; florescent lights, white washers, beige floor and dryers made of glass and steel. The hardware gleamed brighter than my whites. The space beyond the windows looked like the backside of theater curtains.
I was one of three people in the place, all stationed at different folding tables, silently piling their faded clothes and bedding. I was wrestling, as I always do, with a fitted sheet, when a gruff man and a stick-thin woman in men’s clothing walked in. They moved in awkward stutters and half-weaves, but were having an active and animated conversation over the rustling of a plastic bag of Chinese take-out.
I dismissed it as bum drivel until I noticed that the man seemed relatively well-kempt. He began to unpack the food before them, using the small magazine table as a dining area. The man was pleased with himself, and kept commenting on the generous portion sizes before them. The woman seemed conflicted, and kept fidgeting in her chair. A shotglass laced onto a cord around her neck waved back and forth on her flat chest.
Man: I want you to eat something.
Woman: I’m not really that hungry.
M: I want to make sure that..
W: You know I pray every day? I pray for theweriwn… iweonodg.. eijgo…
M: Eat! Look at all this good food.
W: Let’s just go back and look at it and do this.
M: I want to make sure you aren’t using the money to shoot up or something. I want you to feed yourself.
W: Let’s just go do it. F*** all these people. I pray every day. F*** them.
The conversation went on like this; the woman cursing the rest of us, who were now folding as quickly as we could. At the time, I was pissed about something totally unrelated, so I missed that this crude scene was actually sort of a touching one. These two were about to engage in prostitution, but this man wanted more than just sex. He wanted to feel like a man, too.
Filed under: Daily Specials | Tags: eating, flowers, frivolity, life, lunch, observations, people, random, relief, tension, thoughts
Tonight’s drink: Oak Creek Cabernet
There’s something similar about the tensions of a twelve o’clock lunch crowd, and a row of closed daisies, waiting to bloom. You can see that both are queuing for something; there is a restlessness in their still focus on the present.
Then, when the diners have their meals and sit at the groups of tables outside, there is a rhythm to the eating, the drinking and the pausing. Just as the first rays of sun start to warm the outsides of the petals, each bit of nourishment soaks their insides; the hydraulic-like depression pulls the tensions away, and blooms ensue.
The diners sit back in their chairs and begin to carry on conversations again, their quirks and distinguishing marks making them individuals. The flowers, too, are suddenly unique characters, where they were once simply a mark in a carpet of flower beds. The bees take time with each one.
Filed under: Daily Specials | Tags: confidence, life, observations, poise, random, relationships, thoughts, women
Last Night’s Drink: Sideshow Contortionist
There is an aspect of beauty and self-image that is missing from the usual mantras of diet, exercise, and confidence: that aspect is poise.
It seems like many people view poise as a stuffy, archaic idea that your grandma used to harp on you about, or a natural byproduct of confidence. However, poise is a complex attribute all its own that combines a person’s physical, intellectual, and emotional states into an intangible, yet noticeable, exuberance. It’s that thing about someone that people are drawn to, but can’t quite describe.
Poise gives an air of confidence, whether or not you actually have it. Just like you can plaster on a fake smile and look effortlessly cool, you can pull on a suit of composure and look as if you’ve got the world by a string. As such, confidence isn’t a requirement for poise; rather, confidence will often follow it. Just like smiling when you’re down will help to bring you up, faking it helps to bring it to fruition.
Poise isn’t about being thin, beautiful, smart, gifted, or anything else that popular media desires - it’s about carrying yourself in a way that shows you are in this world, and that it’s a good thing. However, one of the key factors in poise is class, so that you aren’t being self-righteous about the space you are taking up. Rather, you’re considerate, but substantial. You are not invisible, but your modesty doesn’t apologize for who you are.
The one prerequisite to poise is self-acceptance, because before you present yourself, you have to know what you’re presenting. Everyone has things about themselves that they don’t like, but the key to gaining acceptance of these things is to understand why you don’t like them. Is it because it’s a bad habit that keeps you from feeling your best? Is it because it’s sending a message to others that doesn’t accurately reflect who you are? The most important thing about this first step is to ensure that it’s really you that doesn’t approve of that part of you. If you base your opinion of yourself on popular media and stereotypes, you’ll find that self-acceptance is a moving target. Public opinion is more fickle than a Mac-ophile. However, if this is one of the qualities you enjoy about yourself, then rock on.
Obviously, poise is a balance that you have to strike between good posture, positive attitude, and a self respect. It attracts people’s attention in the same way as overt sexuality and obnoxious behavior, but it maintains your mystery and dignity. No matter what you do and how you bend, someone’s going to criticize you. May as well be ready to justify your actions to yourself, and to keep your back straight as you pass them by.
F*&# ‘em if they can’t take a joke.
